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8 Things I’ve Learned from Stomach Bugs

March 8, 2012

This winter has been horrible for stomach bugs in our town.  I don’t know if it’s the cold-warm-cold-warm flip flop Mother Nature keeps handing us or what, but we have both winter bugs and spring viruses being passed around and around.  The only positive out of the repeating illnesses is that they’ve taught me quite a few things.

  1. Stomach bugs are psychic.  If you make plans for yourself on a day when your kids will all be in activities or school, the stomach bug will hit the night before, to ruin your plans.  Even if those plans are just to get to Urgent Care to have someone make sure your eye isn’t scratched requiring you to wear an eye patch and speak in “ARGHs.”
  2. Stomach bugs have a sick sense of humor.  If you happen to stay up much later than normal reading a few more chapters of a great book, chances are good that the stomach bug will hit your house that night, ensuring you’ll be so tired, you will surely stumble into a puddle of vomit.
  3. The art of learning how to throw up is underrated.  Sure, no one likes getting sick.  But I have great appreciation for my oldest who now knows how to make it to the bathroom in time to keep clean-up to a minimum.  My younger two….not so much.
  4. There is a downside to having your children sleep on a different floor than you.  Specifically, the trail from their bedroom that goes all the way down the stairs, around the house to reach you in your bedroom.
  5. The range of vomit spray is exponentially larger than the person from whom it comes.  Just when I thought I had cleaned up everything from my 6-year-old’s stomach bug last night, I looked up.  Vomit splatter had reached at least the five foot mark on the walls.  How does that even happen when he’s not even 4 feet tall?
  6. The scent of the cleaning products will soon start to smell just like what they’re meant to eradicate.  After using Lysol wipes on the hardwood floors where he got sick, I now can’t even stomach the smell of the wipes.  Thankfully, they come in more than one scent.
  7. Every cough, burp or loud swallow will have you reflexively jumping in anticipation of more vomit.  Once the stomach bug hits, you will not be able to relax for fear of a relapse.  You will also treat any other children in the house as if they are about to erupt a la The Exorcist.
  8. Moms will happily endure all of the above for the snuggles that come afterward.  There are few things in this world with a greater payoff than a snuggle from a kid who just needs his Mommy.  Even though they have that sickly sweet stench of fever and illness surrounding them, despite the showers and Lysol bath you insisted upon, when a sick kid scooches over beside you and wraps your arm around his little body, it is a wonderful experience.
3 Comments leave one →
  1. ashleyinnc permalink
    March 8, 2012 7:44 AM

    Yep to all of it. Every last one of them. Except you forgot to mention that invariably (at least in my house) you will have to then sleep with the sick kid and nothing says fun like the middle of the night warm, puke fest. Ooops, did I go too far? 😉

    • March 8, 2012 8:17 AM

      Luckily we have another solution in our house. The sick kid curls up on the leather chair in the living room (leather = wipeable) while I sleep on the couch right next to it. An arm’s reach away and horrible night’s sleep, sure. But closer to the bathroom and out of puke range. 😉


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